Sometimes justice comes in the form of not losing. It can be more gratifying than you think. When you wait for a hearing to happen for a year and a half, and your opponent doesn’t come away with what they want, it’s a win.

At the end of the summer, we took the kids and my father, who was battling for his life a year ago, to a Steelers pre-season game. His ticket was his birthday present. This will sound odd to some of you, especially if you didn’t grow up in the north watching pro football, but being a Steeler fan is a family activity. I associate it with good times and experiencing  together the ups and downs of a group of overgrown men on a Sunday afternoon. I felt weepy when the streetcar deposited us into the black and gold crowd. My daughter did shed a few tears in the stadium, because it was just amazing to be at Heinz Field. (It’s a beautiful structure, especially compared to clunky Three Rivers.) Yinz know what I mean?

Would you believe my husband’s ex-wife had her lawyer tell the court that if we can afford that, we should be paying her more? My husband has been paying her more than he can afford for a long time, which means I am pitching in more for expenses than I used to. And that’s fine, except that for her to assert that she gets a say in how we spend what money we are not paying her is outrageous. So I told her I paid for the tickets. I should have kept my mouth shut, because she will portray it as a Jerry Springer moment. But that’s what bullies do. She can say I attacked her outside the courthouse all day long. I will not stop calling a spade a spade.

This was hardly the focal point of the morning. My husband argued his case with an equilibrium and eloquence that only a gifted thinker and speaker can tap into, especially under pressure. May the ultimate outcome, later this month, be equally satisfying.


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  1. PhiloPsycho says:

    Best wishes on a favorable outcome (to your side)!

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