Beyond Dragons

Just as Game of Thrones left me cold at the end of season two with an overkill of violence and sexism (leaving viewers like me without a character we could believe in or a narrative arc that wasn’t an emotional sinkhole), I find myself in a no-woman’s land on many levels. ¬†This is fairly obvious, […]

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May 16th, 2016 by Wanda

If I Had a Dragon

Sometimes I wish I had dragons like Daenerys Stormborn (Game of Thrones reference). I would only use them for just ends, I swear. Okay, occasionally she errs on the side of justice, and compassion falls by the wayside. I’d be on my guard so this would’t happen to me. No heads on stakes, I swear. […]

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July 7th, 2014 by Wanda

Sutra 1.33: Ah, Now There’s Advice I Can Follow

I have written a lot about the high (impossible?) standard the Dalai Lama sets when he expects compassion for our enemies. I understand that harboring anger toward our enemies, even only within ourselves, hidden from public view, is only damaging to ourselves and others. Revenge isn’t even a question. But why do I owe compassion […]

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June 10th, 2014 by Wanda

I Will Not Give Her a Weapon

I like words. I like to write. At first, I didn’t defend myself because stirring the pot could upset custody issues and take the focus off of the important things. I didn’t want to turn into Jerry Springer. So I said nothing. It cost me dearly. I’m not the kind of person who spouts off […]

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June 10th, 2014 by Wanda

It’s Almost Like Polygamy

So, when I came into this marriage I was financially stable. I didn’t have a lot, but I had enough. I could have sent my daughter to college with a little planning and discipline. Now, I am in quite a bit of debt and facing putting three kids through college while paying permanent alimony to […]

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June 10th, 2014 by Wanda

Alimony Laws are Sexist

Compare these two cases side by side: 1) A man is married to a female physician for over a decade. He does some coaching and consulting, but is largely a stay-at-home dad. His youngest is about to go off to college. He and his wife go through a tumultuous no-fault divorce. After several years of […]

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May 5th, 2014 by Wanda

The Day in Court

Wordsworth wrote that poetry is “the spontaneous overflow of powerful feelings: it takes its origin from¬†emotion recollected in tranquility.” Been waiting for tranquility in order to write eloquently about the day in court, but it’s not forthcoming. Long story short, the cougar ex-wife showed up with a sack and ashes routine. No highlights, hair cut […]

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May 1st, 2014 by Wanda

Final Hearing but Not Really

Without getting into it–because I am exhausted in a weird out-of-body kind of way–the final hearing wasn’t final. The good news: 1) her new lawyer seemed reasonable and smart. 2) ours is also reasonable and did a good job. 3) custody is set. The bad: 1) the temporary order, which no one could find until […]

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April 1st, 2014 by Wanda

Disturbance in the Forcefield: Or Why I Hate Facebook

Everything comes full circle. So when this circus began, the ex went on Facebook and said nasty things about me. Friends rallied. Then she took them down. That was the fall of 2010. Last week, she created one of those fund-raising web-sites, which she linked to her Facebook page with pictures of her children 10 […]

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February 26th, 2014 by Wanda

Being a Stepmom Mostly Sucks

First of all, you suffer the brunt of all attacks but are not allowed to defend yourself or even be a proactive part of the process. Lawyers remind you you are not the client and treat you like you are too stupid to understand the process and the pacing of these things. What I understand […]

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January 29th, 2014 by Wanda